Thursday, November 4, 2010

Time of the month

Over coming challenges is part of the course in any new job, its what makes it so exciting to start with, writing creates many challenges especially for someone who has not written for over ten years .Knowing when to stop and call it a day, is as important as knowing when to carry on with the flow. I cannot work if I haven't had enough sleep, the weekends are out of bounds, I work through lunch but still need to eat. Being organised and not getting stressed is vital the greatest  pressure sometimes coming  from yourself .  Adapting to changes in circumstances is something as mothers we learn and practice all the time, so I take lots of deep breaths, try to stay calm, get as much sleep as my youngest will allow, and acknowledge that tomorrow is another day . Last week I felt frustrated at not being able to spend as much time as I would like writing. Because of the numerous interludes that having a family and life in general gives you. This week I am concentrating on the belief within myself, to continue to remain strong and positive believing this will see me through to the end.Realising that also only by working hard and improving will I ever realise this dream is possible, that it is not a race and it is within my grasp.  As I walked through Borders yesterday to get my son his latest Rick Riordan book I am gripped by this overwhelming desire and exhilarating feeling now to see my name on a shiny glossy book cover, but there are so many!!!!

Anyway, this week I have changed the heading somewhat,  as when I started out back in September, my reason for the blog may have seemed somewhat unclear, maybe even vague. I feel the above title now acknowledges what my intention is right from the start.My hope is to attract other writers to join this expedition so we can all learn from each other, I know I have so much to learn and would welcome great advice and help. It would also be so good to share our experiences. we all have such different ideas, view points and life can be quite solitary when you spend so much of your time writing. I would write all the time if I could! Another, discovery is the fact you spend so much time sat down, something that is so alien to me as a mother always on the go, my back is killing me, it is stiff, and aching at the end of the day. I have yet to find a good comfortable chair from which I can type my work into the computer, any ideas?  My Blog as always is open to all for thoughts and queries and to share a little in my world. It is my record of my trails, and tribulations during this year of writing.

It has been a good week for writing I am on chapter eighteen on the computer now, and my story board has several more ideas for chapters that need to be developed so lots to do. I have 132 pages so far, I am not sure if that is a good amount, average? What I do know is that some chapters are longer than others, some I love more than others,  most need a lot of refining. At the moment I feel I have climbed up a hill only to realise it is the first of many. I love where the story is at the moment I would say about half way, the main characters are closer, getting to knowing each other, discovering things about themselves and the plot is starting to be peeled off layer by layer, gradually getting a little bit more exciting and interesting as the sub plot comes into play. However, to tantalise, to tease , to want more ,and pull it out of the hat, to make it sing, make sense, become a page needs more finesse .  !!!!   

I still feel excited and happy everyday to be able to do what I love, some days are more productive than others, some days  I need music and some just the stillness. Sitting in my sun room looking out at my chaotic messy garden I talk my plot through until it makes sense. My husband frequently stops by and enquires how am I doing,only to get promptly yelled at. I would like to say I have only become moody since my writing began but it would not be true. I am driven, and beholden sometimes to my hormones, it is that time of the month when the hormones fluctuate and cause all manners of mood swings and fights. However to be asked the same question over an over, is driving me insane, he is eager for me to finish and hence I feel under pressure. As politely as I can, I tell him to bugger off and leave me alone to finish my work, but as he is taking a coffee break I end up feeling as if I need one, and so the disruption goes on. There are days when I have the house to myself and those are the best, I write until my head throbs, my neck aches, and then I get up and read my words out aloud to see how they sound.Some days I have been extremely lucky mainly on a Friday when apart from the obvious drop offs and pick ups I have been able to continue to write into the evening oblivious to anything other than writing as my husband has taken charge of the boys.  My husband is my rock, and he knows me well,god bless his patience.

This week I leave you not with a quote but my horoscope for today, I do so believe in the little signs that pick you up and keep you going ,

If you get a hunch about something possessing much greater potential than anyone thought dont ignore it. Check it and follow through on what could be very promising.

It is all about belief and being positive !!!!!

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